He is God. I am not.

I have been thinking a lot lately about the hopes and dreams I have had in my life. I guess this is the result of facing the reality that I really am mid-life at this point or, if you look at that as a literal cradle-to-grave thing, I am probably beyond mid-life.

When I look at the hopes and dreams I have had, it is frustrating. I came of age in the 80s and 90s. I always wanted more. More of everything and more than everyone else.

I realize now, of course, how selfish that attitude was but yet, deep down, a part of me is still in its clutches.

However, when I remember that God is God, and I am not, then I start to want His best. His best for me but also His best for those around me. And that is when I start to realize that when I seek things from my own selfish desires they turn out to not at all hold what I had hoped they would hold.

But, when I see what God wants, I find love, I find friendship, I find the warmth of living for others and the warmth of others living for me. (Strange concept that is -- others living for you ... but yet that is what Christian community offers, don't you think?)

God wants me to break free from the desires of this world that ensnare me. He is God. I am not.

Easier said than done. But try I must because what he offers is not the glitz and glitter of this world because the glitz and glitter of this world quickly turns to dirt and litter. It is His all that He offers. His best. His best for me and for all those who love Him and seek him, even suffering in this world, because we live for something greater to come. His promise.

He is God. I am not.