Sunday, September 13, 2009
WE ALWAYS HURT THE ONES WE LOVE
“We always hurt the ones we love.” Have you ever experienced either side of that? Have you been the one to hurt someone you really care about … or have you been hurt by the words of someone who you love?
It’s kind of an interesting concept, don’t you think? Why would we hurt the ones we love the most? How could that be? Those we probably least want to hurt … are the ones we hurt.
I think there are a lot of reasons why this old adage rings so true for all of us but, for me, the primary reason has been because I tend to be the most honest with those to whom I am closest. If I have that feeling of intimacy … and vulnerability … with someone, I tend to be more open with my thoughts. Sometimes those thoughts have a solid basis and are accurate … and other times in retrospect I later discover they were a bit off base – perhaps too “heat of the moment” – but they came out anyway in the presence of someone I loved.
And, you know what … hopefully we have all experienced this on both sides as well … the one who has been hurt, because of the love they hold … understands and comes back … sometimes even reaching out to us all the more.
I think this is the relationship that God wants to have with us. His love for us will never end … He wants us to be honest and raw with Him … and He will always be there for us.
Many folks who are trying to walk with God may make the statement “God is my best friend.” Have you ever heard anyone say that before? Or perhaps you’ve said it? In light of that statement, though, let’s ask ourselves something – “Really?” Is He really our best friend or is that just a nice “Christianese” statement to make?
Because, if He’s really our best friend, we’re going to be taking things to Him that we’d take to our best friends. We’re going to have that kind of vulnerability and that kind of raw truthfulness and honest. We’re going to talk about our fears, our anxieties, our hurts and pains, our joys and our sufferings. We’re going to talk about those things with the creator of the universe. Because He loves us and He truly wants us to be our best friend.
God create Adam and then Even in the garden to have this kind of intimacy with Him. Face it, they didn’t know a whole lot of others at the time. God had at least a 50-50 chance of being their best friend. He sought this intimacy.
Then the fall came and God became a bit more far off … only a select few really got to have that close intimacy with Him, usually in a very dramatic turn of events such as things self combusting and the earth shaking.
But it was obvious after a few thousand years that we weren’t going to “get it” in that fashion. So, God sent His son – Jesus Christ – to actually be in community with us. And, for 30 years, despite the prophecies, from all appearances, Jesus was a pretty normal guy. Yeah, he was a gifted student but those come along now and then. He lived with friends and family members just as you and I do. They thought of Him as being their friend … I’m sure that even as a child some folks didn’t care for Him … He was from all appearances … human. People had relationships with Jesus just like we have relationships with each other. I’m sure He hurt some folks along the way and some folks hurt Him . We always hurt the ones we love.
But people also shared with Him … and the Bible gives us glimpses of people sharing their hurts, their pasts, their anxieties, and their joys with Him. Just like we share them with each other. That had to have been amazing.
Think about being one of His disciples or one of the others that traveled with Jesus during His actual ministry. How powerful after He was gone from this earth for them to have been able to think “Wow … that was the son of God … and I told him all my “stuff” … He was my friend, my confidante … He laughed and He cried with me … the son of God laughed and cried with me.”
Just as we laugh and cry … sometimes hurt and are sometimes hurt by … those we love here on earth today.
Jesus was sent here to restore that intimacy … that communion … that closeness between us and God … the creator of all. When He died, the veil was torn … there was no longer to be this big chasm between ourselves and God. We were to pray direct to Him … have the Holy Spirit here to guide us and flow through us. He was sent here to change thousands of years of separation that has occurred after the fall.
But do I take advantage of it? Or do I still try to compartmentalize God? Do I still want to hide things from Him … or do I think He would not want to be bothered by my stuff?
We always hurt the ones we love … that means we are open and honest … we get stuff out in the open … we talk about our pasts … we talk about when we’ve been hurt … or when we’ve triumphed … when we’ve worried … when we’ve hurt others. That makes part of the journey of life … knowing that we have earthly friends with whom we can share those things.
And I suppose it’s easier for us to relate to sharing those things with someone we can look at eye-to-eye … with someone who can physically hold or touch us … with someone who can always speak with words we can hear and understand.
God often speaks to us in other ways … through nudges … sometimes through revelations … and some folks will tell you they have audibly heard Him. He also speaks to us through His word … the Bible … put together for us to provide us, I believe, with every answer we could ever need. And, if we get honest with Him about our stuff, He will bring us to points of experience and eventual healing … because He loves us … and He wants to know what is holding us back from fully experiencing His love.
We always hurt the ones we love … we know what that means here on earth … we’re open with and vulnerable to those with whom we share our closest intimacy. God wants that intimacy with us … He wants to be the one we love the most … that was Jesus’ greatest commandment to us. Jesus also declared in John 15 that we’re no longer slaves to God … but we are His friend … He has revealed and will continue to reveal to us everything about Himself and everything we need to know. He got very real with us … when will we be real with Him? When will we show the vulnerability to get honest with the creator of the universe to the point of where we may feel like we’re hurting One who we love? His love for us, endless, will cause our relationship to only grow through that.
It’s kind of an interesting concept, don’t you think? Why would we hurt the ones we love the most? How could that be? Those we probably least want to hurt … are the ones we hurt.
I think there are a lot of reasons why this old adage rings so true for all of us but, for me, the primary reason has been because I tend to be the most honest with those to whom I am closest. If I have that feeling of intimacy … and vulnerability … with someone, I tend to be more open with my thoughts. Sometimes those thoughts have a solid basis and are accurate … and other times in retrospect I later discover they were a bit off base – perhaps too “heat of the moment” – but they came out anyway in the presence of someone I loved.
And, you know what … hopefully we have all experienced this on both sides as well … the one who has been hurt, because of the love they hold … understands and comes back … sometimes even reaching out to us all the more.
I think this is the relationship that God wants to have with us. His love for us will never end … He wants us to be honest and raw with Him … and He will always be there for us.
Many folks who are trying to walk with God may make the statement “God is my best friend.” Have you ever heard anyone say that before? Or perhaps you’ve said it? In light of that statement, though, let’s ask ourselves something – “Really?” Is He really our best friend or is that just a nice “Christianese” statement to make?
Because, if He’s really our best friend, we’re going to be taking things to Him that we’d take to our best friends. We’re going to have that kind of vulnerability and that kind of raw truthfulness and honest. We’re going to talk about our fears, our anxieties, our hurts and pains, our joys and our sufferings. We’re going to talk about those things with the creator of the universe. Because He loves us and He truly wants us to be our best friend.
God create Adam and then Even in the garden to have this kind of intimacy with Him. Face it, they didn’t know a whole lot of others at the time. God had at least a 50-50 chance of being their best friend. He sought this intimacy.
Then the fall came and God became a bit more far off … only a select few really got to have that close intimacy with Him, usually in a very dramatic turn of events such as things self combusting and the earth shaking.
But it was obvious after a few thousand years that we weren’t going to “get it” in that fashion. So, God sent His son – Jesus Christ – to actually be in community with us. And, for 30 years, despite the prophecies, from all appearances, Jesus was a pretty normal guy. Yeah, he was a gifted student but those come along now and then. He lived with friends and family members just as you and I do. They thought of Him as being their friend … I’m sure that even as a child some folks didn’t care for Him … He was from all appearances … human. People had relationships with Jesus just like we have relationships with each other. I’m sure He hurt some folks along the way and some folks hurt Him . We always hurt the ones we love.
But people also shared with Him … and the Bible gives us glimpses of people sharing their hurts, their pasts, their anxieties, and their joys with Him. Just like we share them with each other. That had to have been amazing.
Think about being one of His disciples or one of the others that traveled with Jesus during His actual ministry. How powerful after He was gone from this earth for them to have been able to think “Wow … that was the son of God … and I told him all my “stuff” … He was my friend, my confidante … He laughed and He cried with me … the son of God laughed and cried with me.”
Just as we laugh and cry … sometimes hurt and are sometimes hurt by … those we love here on earth today.
Jesus was sent here to restore that intimacy … that communion … that closeness between us and God … the creator of all. When He died, the veil was torn … there was no longer to be this big chasm between ourselves and God. We were to pray direct to Him … have the Holy Spirit here to guide us and flow through us. He was sent here to change thousands of years of separation that has occurred after the fall.
But do I take advantage of it? Or do I still try to compartmentalize God? Do I still want to hide things from Him … or do I think He would not want to be bothered by my stuff?
We always hurt the ones we love … that means we are open and honest … we get stuff out in the open … we talk about our pasts … we talk about when we’ve been hurt … or when we’ve triumphed … when we’ve worried … when we’ve hurt others. That makes part of the journey of life … knowing that we have earthly friends with whom we can share those things.
And I suppose it’s easier for us to relate to sharing those things with someone we can look at eye-to-eye … with someone who can physically hold or touch us … with someone who can always speak with words we can hear and understand.
God often speaks to us in other ways … through nudges … sometimes through revelations … and some folks will tell you they have audibly heard Him. He also speaks to us through His word … the Bible … put together for us to provide us, I believe, with every answer we could ever need. And, if we get honest with Him about our stuff, He will bring us to points of experience and eventual healing … because He loves us … and He wants to know what is holding us back from fully experiencing His love.
We always hurt the ones we love … we know what that means here on earth … we’re open with and vulnerable to those with whom we share our closest intimacy. God wants that intimacy with us … He wants to be the one we love the most … that was Jesus’ greatest commandment to us. Jesus also declared in John 15 that we’re no longer slaves to God … but we are His friend … He has revealed and will continue to reveal to us everything about Himself and everything we need to know. He got very real with us … when will we be real with Him? When will we show the vulnerability to get honest with the creator of the universe to the point of where we may feel like we’re hurting One who we love? His love for us, endless, will cause our relationship to only grow through that.
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